Author's Note: This poem was inspired by Stevenson's constant reference to the duality of man. He proves through Jekyll and Hyde that every person has two sides to them and whichever personality is given more attention ends up dominating over the other. Jekyll experiences this when he describes, "that part of me which I had the power of projecting, had lately been exercised and nourished; it had seemed to me of late as though the body of Edward Hyde had grown in stature..." (113) It's a slow fade, but when you feed the bad, the evil, and the immorality, it eventually grows into a garden of wrong intentions.
Dry, untouched
A speck of small desires
Deprivation of attention
Of the springs of life
Across the rocky ground
There feeds color
But here, only hidden thoughts
The dark clouds roll over
The scorched earth cries out
Drops of hell fall to the cracked soil
A wet sense of relief
Hits the underdeveloped seed below
Dominating, forceful
The stronghold breaks through the land
Towering the innocent petals of youth
Growing swiftly alongside the storm
Hiding humility
The night brings forth temptation
A new form of life breaks lose
Seceding former morality
Feeding future intentions
Hungry for so long
Finally nourished
The arid earth rejoices
Flaming with iniquity
Morning interrupts the sensation
Sun pouring in with hope
But the garden remains
Forever quenched by the night's storm
Monday, February 20, 2012
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
The Love that Killed
Author's Note: Towards the end of the novel Jekyll and Hyde, we are hit hard by the theme of responsibility and how we as humans consequently feel enslaved by our personal responsibility to the people we know and care about. A friend of Jekyll's, Dr. Lanyon, experiences this moral tug when he receives a letter from Jekyll crying out for his help in a dangerous situation. Parts of the letter read, "these arrangements are of capital importance; and that by the neglect of one of them...you might have charged your conscience with my death or the shipwreck of my reason...and if that night passes without event, you will know that you have seen the last of Henry Jekyll" (95-96).
"I've never confided in anyone about this. You can't repeat it to anybody. I am only telling you because I trust you with everything I have. I love you."
My mind battled back and forth. I had always learned not to keep secrets if it meant someone was in trouble, but I loved him too and I didn't want to lose his trust. I didn't want him to love me any less and if he found out that I had come clean about this secret, I would be sure to lose him. But then again, what if he actually did something dangerous? What would I do without him? If he was gone, my heart would feel completely empty. The forces argued in my head. He was the most important guy in my life, I couldn't let him down. I had to keep this secret. He would hate me if I told anyone, and I could not let that happen.
And so I kept this burden on my shoulders, I talked him through his struggles and all was well.....
....Until I got a call two weeks later. It was his sobbing mother on the other end. My hands began to sweat and my heart skipped a beat. I already knew what tragic news would be coming through the phone line any second. Tears began to form in my eyes as I heard her utter the words, "We found a suicide letter on his bed last night. It apologized for all the pain he had ever caused us and said the we are better off without him." I could hear the pain in her voice. "We got a call soon thereafter from the police saying they found his dead body in the lake later that night. He had drowned himself." Her voice trailed off as she managed to choke out the rest of the story.
And for the rest of my life, I would have to live knowing that I could have done something to prevent this tragedy. Every day it will haunt me, taunt me; for my personal and social responsibility to him created a barricade, and caused me to lose sight of the bigger picture. I didn't want to let him down, but I ended up letting him down in the biggest way possible. I could have saved his life, but instead...my love killed.
"I've never confided in anyone about this. You can't repeat it to anybody. I am only telling you because I trust you with everything I have. I love you."
My mind battled back and forth. I had always learned not to keep secrets if it meant someone was in trouble, but I loved him too and I didn't want to lose his trust. I didn't want him to love me any less and if he found out that I had come clean about this secret, I would be sure to lose him. But then again, what if he actually did something dangerous? What would I do without him? If he was gone, my heart would feel completely empty. The forces argued in my head. He was the most important guy in my life, I couldn't let him down. I had to keep this secret. He would hate me if I told anyone, and I could not let that happen.
And so I kept this burden on my shoulders, I talked him through his struggles and all was well.....
....Until I got a call two weeks later. It was his sobbing mother on the other end. My hands began to sweat and my heart skipped a beat. I already knew what tragic news would be coming through the phone line any second. Tears began to form in my eyes as I heard her utter the words, "We found a suicide letter on his bed last night. It apologized for all the pain he had ever caused us and said the we are better off without him." I could hear the pain in her voice. "We got a call soon thereafter from the police saying they found his dead body in the lake later that night. He had drowned himself." Her voice trailed off as she managed to choke out the rest of the story.
And for the rest of my life, I would have to live knowing that I could have done something to prevent this tragedy. Every day it will haunt me, taunt me; for my personal and social responsibility to him created a barricade, and caused me to lose sight of the bigger picture. I didn't want to let him down, but I ended up letting him down in the biggest way possible. I could have saved his life, but instead...my love killed.
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
And the answer is...
....not what we want to hear. This has happened to all of us. We spend so much time and energy desiring to discover every answer -- hoping the knowledge will give us some sort of satisfaction -- but then when we uncover the truth, we regret it and want to take back what we have learned, because it is something unpleasant to our heart, mind, or body. Initially, we create a strong drive within us to possess the answers but when granted our wish, we no longer want to know. Enslaved by our curiosity, we hunger for the facts, but suddenly we are cut open by the answers and we end up dwindling down a path we never intended to travel on.
In short, complete and absolute knowledge can endanger us, as it did for Utterson in the novel, Jekyll and Hyde. He was under the pressure and curiosity to find out why Jekyll would want a mysterious creature such as Hyde under his will. With much time and lack of sleep, he received the answers, but they turned up unexpected and continue to haunt him. Now, all he wishes to do is rid of any evidence in order that he not be associated with the details of the traumatic mysteries that lied ahead. "But no sooner was Mr. Utterson alone that night, than he locked the note into his safe, where it reposed from that time forward" (55).
There are many times in life when gaining information is vital and important but in some situations, things are better left unsaid, untouched, and unknown. If we get too caught up in the idea that awareness equals happiness, then mistakes will be made and regrets will be had. The desire to know can lead us to strange and daunting places and why be there, when we can remain steadfast in the normalcy of our everyday lives?
In short, complete and absolute knowledge can endanger us, as it did for Utterson in the novel, Jekyll and Hyde. He was under the pressure and curiosity to find out why Jekyll would want a mysterious creature such as Hyde under his will. With much time and lack of sleep, he received the answers, but they turned up unexpected and continue to haunt him. Now, all he wishes to do is rid of any evidence in order that he not be associated with the details of the traumatic mysteries that lied ahead. "But no sooner was Mr. Utterson alone that night, than he locked the note into his safe, where it reposed from that time forward" (55).
There are many times in life when gaining information is vital and important but in some situations, things are better left unsaid, untouched, and unknown. If we get too caught up in the idea that awareness equals happiness, then mistakes will be made and regrets will be had. The desire to know can lead us to strange and daunting places and why be there, when we can remain steadfast in the normalcy of our everyday lives?
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